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That’s the Memory Man.” said the bartender. “He knows everything, remembers everything. He can remember every face he’s ever seen. He can remember any fact he hears or reads. Go and try him out.” So the Liverpudlian goes over, and thinking he won’t know about English football, asks “Who won the 1965 FA Cup Final?”. Then Snow White says, "How do I know I'm the most beautiful woman in the world? Perhaps there is someone more beautiful than me!" And she got very depressed. Arsene Wenger was to meet his new girlfriend outside the Cinema at 7pm, at 9pm she had still not arrived, so he went home furious.
I recently proposed to my girlfriend, who is from Liverpool. How did I know she was "the one"? Because she stole my heart. Away fans are advised when driving down Alex Ferguson Road, not to forget to add 9 minutes to their journey. Roberto Martínez’s men were annihilated at Anfield following Ramiro Funes Mori’s red card on fifty minutes – their opponents managed to register thirty-seven shots in total, compared with Everton’s three. A primary teacher informs her students that she is a Liverpool fan. She invites her students to raise their hands if they, too, support Liverpool. Except for one little girl, everyone in the class raises their hands. Colin told the ECHO Lifestyles Alsop Fitness Centre has opened a memorial at the gym so people can come and share their memories of Paul. He said the family have yet to announce when the funeral will take place, but Paul's mum said it would be held at St Mary's Church, West Derby.
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Some 'your da' jokes have taken on an elevated status and are now the 'your da' jokes against which all other 'your da' jokes are judged.
Kevin Tyrrell commented: “Did you hear about the carrot that died apparently there was a big turnip at his funeral” Thatcher's dead, Fergie's retired and Liverpool are going to win the league. Somewhere there's a Scouser with a lamp and no wishes left. A Primary school teacher explains to her class that she is an Liverpool supporter. She asks her students to raise their hands if they were Liverpool supporters, too.The fourth passenger was the Pope. Pope said to the 5th passenger, an 8-year-old girl, “I’m an old man. I’ll sacrifice my life for yours.” Did you hear about the crossed-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
A dad who was known for his smile and positive energy died suddenly hours after coming home from the Liverpool derby. Similar to biff, this describes anyone who has been a bit of an idiot, from your kid sister to the old fella in the pub who can’t handle his ale. Are you messin? Receive newsletters with the latest news, sport and what's on updates from the Liverpool ECHO by signing up here We might be slightly biased - but it is true that people from Liverpool always manage to find the funny side of things.READ MORE: Tesco, Morrisons and Sainsbury's issue urgent product recalls for soup, pet food and more His friends think that that’s a little bit weird because he has been the biggest LFC fan his whole life. Arsenal Football Club, founded in 1886, is one of the most celebrated football teams in England, boasting a rich history in the Premier League and notable successes in both domestic and international competitions. Based in North London, the club has a passionate global fanbase and is recognized for its distinctive red and white colors, as well as its long-standing rivalry with Tottenham Hotspur. It’s no secret that in Liverpool we have a huge collection of popular sayings that you wouldn’t hear anywhere else.
A policeman stops a suspected drunk driver and asks him to take a breath test, the driver pulls out a medical card that says, “This man is asthmatic please do not take his breath.’ So the policeman asks him to take a blood test, the man then pulls out another card which read ‘This man is anemic, please do not take his blood.” He said: "I don't have an explanation. I have to find out, it's only going on what I've seen. The first half was quite in control. Maybe we had the better chances, we made one mistake. The Spurs fan put his cap over one breast, the Watford fan put his cap over the other, and the Gooner put his cap "down below". Did you hear about the father and his son who went to Anfield to see Liverpool play, and it lived up to expectations? And the Spurs fan was thinking: 'This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel I'll make another kissing noise and hit that Arsenal bastard again, harder.'Can see the Everton fans in the crowd turning around and swearing. Probably at their brother in the home section. They’re having a laugh and a joke and rubbish. Then the second half and the lads are throwing the towel in, you expect to be laughing at the end of the game." New routine Recently my mate started doing his morning workout on the 5:30 service from Norwich to London Liverpool Street.
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